Ingrid Oliver and Lorna Watson star in more character comedy sketches. This show includes a forgetful spy; two very competitive old ladies; supermarket shopping with a Brazilian carnival dancer; and how to get hold of a proper cup of tea. Plus there's some controversial Danish knitwear in Watson and Oliver's own version of The Killing, and a rather surprising guest appearance from Claire Balding...

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Stand back! Give him some air. 0:00:21.360:00:23.04
  - Right. Can you tell me what happened, madam?
- Please do something! He's my dad.
0:00:23.040:00:26.72
- I don't know what happened. He just collapsed.
  - What's his name?
- Keith.
0:00:26.720:00:30.08
Right. Looks like this is your lucky day, Keith. 0:00:30.080:00:32.40
Please. Can you save him? 0:00:32.400:00:34.12
Put it this way, I've won Paramedic Of The Year five years in a row 0:00:34.120:00:36.92
and I've never lost anyone yet, so what do you think? 0:00:36.920:00:39.24
Come on, big man. Come on, Keith. Stay with me. 0:00:39.240:00:42.72
He's turning blue! 0:00:42.720:00:44.12
Listen, it's not your time, Keith. 0:00:44.120:00:46.00
I've never left a man behind and I am not about to start now. 0:00:46.000:00:48.64
He's opening his eyes. 0:00:48.640:00:50.32
Damn right he is. 0:00:50.320:00:51.36
He wants to see the face of the woman who's going to save his life. 0:00:51.360:00:54.48
Please tell me he's going to be OK! 0:00:54.480:00:56.24
Listen, I cannot stress enough that I have never, ever lost anyone. 0:00:56.240:00:59.60
Ever. OK? Just a few more seconds and we're home and dry. 0:00:59.600:01:02.40
So he's not going to die? 0:01:02.400:01:04.40
Not on my watch. 0:01:06.120:01:07.44
BLEEPING 0:01:08.920:01:10.40
But unfortunately, that's my watch over. 0:01:10.400:01:12.72
It's Sandra's watch now. 0:01:12.720:01:14.24
Right. 0:01:16.600:01:18.08
Does anyone know any medicine? 0:01:18.080:01:19.96
Good luck with it all, yeah? 0:01:21.880:01:23.80
Girls? Girls! 0:01:32.880:01:35.36
Come and see my new invention! 0:01:35.360:01:37.64
Hurrah! 0:01:37.640:01:38.80
Do hurry, Nettie! 0:01:48.480:01:49.92
I'm coming, just as fast as I can! 0:01:49.920:01:52.48
Father, Father, what is it? 0:02:00.080:02:02.20
CHUCKLES You'll see. Now, stay there. 0:02:02.200:02:04.24
Right. 0:02:04.240:02:05.68
A-ha! 0:02:05.680:02:06.72
- BOTH:
  - Goodness!
0:02:06.720:02:08.00
What do you think? She's a beauty, isn't she? 0:02:08.000:02:10.64
I'll say! What does it do? 0:02:10.640:02:12.84
I'll show you! 0:02:12.840:02:14.44
Now, hold this for me and hand me those goggles. 0:02:14.440:02:17.36
There. 0:02:18.320:02:20.40
Are you ready? 0:02:21.760:02:24.16
  - Yes!
- Yes!
0:02:25.080:02:26.80
HE LAUGHS 0:02:26.800:02:28.80
Heurgh! 0:02:33.560:02:35.96
Whoa-oh-argh-argh-argh-argh! 0:02:35.960:02:39.24
Oh-whoa-oh-whoa-ow! Ugh! Ah! 0:02:39.240:02:44.08
GLASS SMASHES 0:02:44.080:02:45.12
  - Bravo!
- Bravo, Daddy!
0:02:47.480:02:49.24
EXPLOSION 0:02:52.080:02:55.04
CRASH 0:02:56.040:02:57.56
Daddy? 0:02:59.200:03:01.36
Daddy? 0:03:01.360:03:02.88
For God's sake, girls... 0:03:02.880:03:04.84
HE COUGHS ..go and get your mother. 0:03:04.840:03:07.56
SAMBA MUSIC 0:03:07.560:03:10.56
MUSIC STOPS 0:03:14.160:03:17.88
DRUMBEAT 0:03:17.880:03:19.28
DRUMBEAT 0:03:21.960:03:23.00
MUSIC STARTS 0:03:25.240:03:28.28
Cup of tea, £2.90. 0:06:54.840:06:57.56
What's this? 0:06:57.560:06:58.60
Er, milk is down the end, with the cinnamon and stirrers. 0:06:58.600:07:01.68
Sorry, I'm going to ask you again - what is this? 0:07:01.680:07:04.60
It's a cup of tea. £2.90. 0:07:05.720:07:07.72
No. No. This is not a cup of tea. 0:07:07.720:07:10.68
This is some of the ingredients for a cup of tea, partially assembled. 0:07:10.680:07:14.24
It's a cup of tea. 0:07:15.840:07:17.32
Now, I'm not an unreasonable woman. 0:07:17.320:07:19.68
I don't expect loose-leaf tea or a porcelain teapot. 0:07:19.680:07:23.60
I don't mind a tea bag, and this is probably a very good tea bag, 0:07:23.600:07:27.16
containing the potential for a very good cup of tea, 0:07:27.160:07:29.72
but this... This is not a cup of tea. 0:07:29.720:07:32.56
This is a paper cup with a tea bag at the bottom, 0:07:32.560:07:35.00
which you've filled to the brim with super-heated water, 0:07:35.000:07:37.48
so I refer to my earlier comment - 0:07:37.480:07:39.84
this is not a cup of tea. 0:07:39.840:07:41.96
Look, I need to serve all... 0:07:41.960:07:43.36
This is Britain - a nation founded on tea. 0:07:43.360:07:47.64
Tea is a medicine. Tea is Mummy kissing it all better. 0:07:47.640:07:51.88
Tea is what you crave after a blustery walk on a crisp autumn day, 0:07:51.880:07:55.84
or after your husband leaves you for a 23-year-old Belarussian nanny. 0:07:55.840:07:59.60
Tea is love, and family and friends. 0:08:01.600:08:04.92
Tea makes you go like this when someone offers it to you - "Tea?" 0:08:04.920:08:07.76
"Ooooh, lovely!" 0:08:07.760:08:09.80
This - this does not make me want to "ooooh". 0:08:09.800:08:13.36
This makes me want to weep, for tea, and how we have betrayed it. 0:08:13.360:08:17.80
It's true. 0:08:17.800:08:18.84
I really wanted a cup of tea, but when I left the office 0:08:19.800:08:22.64
this morning, I said, "I'm going to go and get a coffee." 0:08:22.640:08:25.40
Get a coffee? 0:08:25.400:08:27.28
That's not even proper English! 0:08:27.280:08:28.80
Well said, brother. 0:08:28.800:08:30.52
Hear, hear! 0:08:30.520:08:32.28
And you there, sister - what is that you're eating? 0:08:32.280:08:35.92
A muffin. 0:08:35.920:08:37.24
That is not a muffin. 0:08:37.240:08:39.04
This is a muffin! 0:08:39.040:08:40.60
ACCORDIAN PLAYS TRADITIONAL MUSIC 0:08:40.600:08:43.84
Hazelnut latte for Terry? 0:08:43.840:08:45.84
Stop right there, Terry. 0:08:45.840:08:47.92
Do you want your name scrawled on that cup, Terry? 0:08:47.920:08:50.28
Is your name so cheap that you have is bandied about like God's own tennis ball? 0:08:50.280:08:53.72
We are British. 0:08:53.720:08:55.32
We barely give our names to our neighbours, or our uncles. 0:08:55.320:08:58.48
Let alone to complete strangers for them to butcher beyond all recognition. 0:08:58.480:09:01.80
There's no I in Terry! 0:09:01.800:09:04.24
She's right - there isn't. 0:09:04.240:09:06.24
If it be a sin to covet tea, 0:09:06.240:09:11.04
then surely I am the most offending soul alive. 0:09:11.040:09:13.64
It's not a sin! 0:09:13.640:09:15.04
Tea's great! 0:09:15.040:09:16.44
Then let us make a stand, here, today. 0:09:16.440:09:20.24
We few, we happy few, we band of tea-drinkers who still remain 0:09:20.240:09:25.92
unsure on the whole milk-in-first-or-last thing. 0:09:25.920:09:28.32
  - I always put mine in last.
- I always put mine in first.
0:09:28.320:09:31.00
If we be mark'd to drink a hot beverage, let it be tea. 0:09:34.040:09:38.44
Every brave man and woman who fights with me here today, 0:09:38.440:09:40.84
raise your mugs, and your voices, 0:09:40.840:09:43.76
and cry, "Long live Darjeeling, Earl Grey and English Breakfast!" 0:09:43.760:09:48.84
CHEERING 0:09:48.840:09:51.56
A proper cup of tea to take away, please. 0:10:01.400:10:03.40
All right. 0:10:03.400:10:05.52
There we are. 0:10:05.520:10:07.16
All right. 0:10:08.520:10:09.56
Oh, OK. 0:10:09.560:10:10.68
This as well. 0:10:12.200:10:13.24
Oh, good. 0:10:13.240:10:14.28
- Oh, and that's yours.
  - Right.
0:10:14.280:10:15.92
Oh, don't forget your strainer. There you go. 0:10:15.920:10:18.44
Excuse me. Ow. Ow. 0:10:18.440:10:21.68
Hey, babe. 0:10:57.720:10:58.76
Oh, hey, hon. 0:10:58.760:11:00.84
You look really pretty, by the way. 0:11:04.480:11:06.64
That colour really suits you. 0:11:06.640:11:09.44
Thank you. 0:11:09.440:11:10.52
So, how's it going with you? 0:11:13.960:11:16.36
So you know how Harry promised me 0:11:16.360:11:18.04
I could scrub in on his triple bypass surgery? 0:11:18.040:11:20.64
Well, apparently now I'm not scrubbing in on his triple bypass surgery. 0:11:22.520:11:25.88
Yah. I sort of overheard some of the nurses talking about it. 0:11:27.160:11:31.20
What did they say? 0:11:32.680:11:34.16
They just saying you weren't scrubbing in 0:11:34.160:11:36.16
on the triple bypass surgery. 0:11:36.160:11:37.64
I can't believe they said about me. 0:11:39.320:11:42.08
So, do you know who IS scrubbing in on the triple bypass surgery? 0:11:42.080:11:46.00
Oh, hi, you guys. 0:11:55.440:11:57.12
Fancy seeing you here. 0:11:57.120:11:58.92
That colour really suits you, by the way. 0:12:11.880:12:14.80
Thank you. 0:12:14.800:12:15.84
Well... 0:12:25.200:12:26.64
Harry said I could scrub in on his triple bypass surgery, yeah? 0:12:26.640:12:30.80
So... I'll see you guys later. 0:12:30.800:12:33.68
Yeah. 0:12:35.040:12:36.08
That's SO out of order, babe. 0:12:51.080:12:53.76
Yah, I know. 0:12:53.760:12:55.16
I'm SO confused right now. 0:12:56.560:12:58.96
How's it looking out there? 0:13:05.120:13:07.68
Iceberg-tastic, Captain. 0:13:07.680:13:10.08
My God! 0:13:10.080:13:11.80
Oh, don't worry - they don't call me 20/20 Tina for nothing. 0:13:11.800:13:16.12
So we aren't going to crash into an iceberg and drown? 0:13:16.120:13:19.60
Not on my watch. 0:13:20.600:13:21.76
BELL DINGS 0:13:25.200:13:26.48
But unfortunately, that's my watch over now. Sandra? 0:13:26.480:13:29.56
Ooh! 0:13:32.600:13:33.64
Who put that there? 0:13:34.840:13:35.96
SAMBA MUSIC 0:13:42.160:13:44.24
MUSIC STOPS 0:13:44.240:13:45.96
MUSIC STARTS 0:13:45.960:13:49.80
MUSIC STOPS 0:13:49.800:13:52.92
MUSIC STARTS 0:13:52.920:13:56.80
MUSIC STOPS 0:13:56.800:13:59.08
MUSIC STARTS 0:14:02.760:14:05.80
- Oh!
  - Oh, hello Eve!
0:14:23.440:14:25.08
Good morning, Anne! 0:14:25.080:14:26.80
How are you today? 0:14:26.800:14:27.84
Yes, yes - well, thank you. And you? 0:14:27.840:14:29.92
Oh, couldn't be better. Yes, Derek's just got a promotion. 0:14:29.920:14:33.48
- Oh.
  - Thus the pagoda.
0:14:33.480:14:35.44
Oh, yes, yes. It's lovely. Ours is handworked wrought iron, of course. 0:14:35.440:14:40.24
You pay a bit more for it but it's worth it. 0:14:40.240:14:42.32
Oh, lovely! 0:14:42.320:14:43.76
Bit bright for me, but I've always said you had modern tastes. 0:14:43.760:14:48.16
How's Peter? 0:14:48.160:14:49.56
Yes, good, good, yes! 0:14:49.560:14:51.40
New job in Hong Kong, so busy, busy, busy! 0:14:51.400:14:54.12
Well, aren't we all? 0:14:54.120:14:55.64
Well, I must dash - we're taking delivery of a new microwave. 0:14:55.640:14:58.56
Oh, right, yes. 0:14:58.560:14:59.88
- Handy little gadgets, aren't they?
  - Mm.
- Not that we need one, what with the Aga.
0:14:59.880:15:03.60
Keeps the kitchen warm too, which is nice, so... 0:15:03.600:15:05.68
Little bit too warm in the summer, though. 0:15:05.680:15:07.56
Not if you know how to use it. 0:15:07.560:15:09.56
I have trouble enough setting the, er, temperature 0:15:09.560:15:12.36
- on the underfloor heating...
  - Right.
- ..and that's state-of-the-art.
0:15:12.360:15:16.20
Yes, well I must pop off. 0:15:16.200:15:18.24
Off to look at a new car. 0:15:18.240:15:19.32
See, the boot on the old one isn't big enough to carry all the luggage 0:15:19.320:15:22.28
that we're taking on our round-the-world cruise 0:15:22.280:15:24.52
to celebrate our grandson getting into Oxford University 0:15:24.520:15:27.08
to study medicine and economics. 0:15:27.080:15:28.60
I'm going to Mars. 0:15:30.680:15:32.16
Sorry, what? 0:15:34.640:15:35.68
I am going to Mars. 0:15:35.680:15:37.48
Mars, Anne? 0:15:37.480:15:39.64
Yes, Eve, Mars - the Red Planet. Mars. 0:15:39.640:15:42.52
Right. 0:15:44.440:15:46.20
Well...we'll all look forward to that, then. 0:15:46.200:15:50.32
- ON TV:
  - 'Ten, nine, eight, seven, six...
0:16:01.480:16:07.44
'That's a negative for launch. All stop. Repeat, launch is NOT go. 0:16:07.440:16:13.08
'Sorry to say this but it seems like we do have a problem.' 0:16:13.080:16:15.72
It doesn't look like we'll be seeing the launch today. 0:16:15.720:16:18.48
I told you she was full of shit. 0:16:20.400:16:22.36
Ooh! 0:16:28.040:16:29.64
Oh. 0:16:29.640:16:30.68
Look what I bought! 0:16:32.640:16:33.76
Oh. 0:16:36.560:16:37.60
- WEAKLY:
  - Yay!
0:16:37.600:16:38.92
And I'm not going to lose this one, 0:16:38.920:16:40.52
because this is the umpteenth board game I've had to buy, 0:16:40.520:16:43.32
cos the other ones keep disappearing. Fancy a game? 0:16:43.320:16:45.92
Mm, no, you're all right, actually. 0:16:45.920:16:48.12
  - Oh, come on!
- No, I think I might just turn in.
0:16:48.120:16:50.64
Lorna, it's 6.30. 0:16:50.640:16:52.20
Gosh, is it that late already? Night, then. 0:16:52.200:16:54.72
Lorna, why don't you want to play Monopoly with me? 0:16:54.720:16:57.56
  - I do.
- Well, you clearly don't.
0:16:57.560:16:59.76
Well, no, it's just... You know, you get a bit competitive, that's all. 0:16:59.760:17:03.00
I don't, do I? 0:17:03.000:17:04.48
Yeah, you do. 0:17:04.480:17:06.24
You're a really bad loser, actually. 0:17:06.240:17:08.04
Well, surely no-one LIKES losing. 0:17:08.040:17:09.72
I don't mind losing. 0:17:09.720:17:11.52
Surely no-one normal likes losing. 0:17:11.520:17:13.60
Come on. Just one game? 0:17:15.400:17:17.28
I dunno. 0:17:17.280:17:18.72
I'll let you wear my flip-flops! 0:17:18.720:17:20.44
  - All weekend?
- Mm-hm.
0:17:20.440:17:22.60
All right, then. 0:17:22.600:17:25.00
  - Just the one game, though.
- Right.
0:17:25.000:17:26.64
Honestly, the way you're carrying on, you'd think I was some kind of monster. 0:17:26.640:17:29.96
  - Right, highest number starts.
- Yep.
0:17:29.960:17:31.56
  - Two.
- Bad luck.
0:17:34.200:17:36.48
Higher than a two, higher than a two. 0:17:36.480:17:38.72
Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on. 0:17:38.720:17:41.40
Gargh! 0:17:45.320:17:46.88
Argh! 0:17:46.880:17:48.08
Gah! 0:17:48.080:17:49.12
Argh! 0:17:49.120:17:50.16
Argh! 0:17:50.160:17:51.20
Argh! 0:17:51.200:17:53.08
Hnuh! 0:17:53.080:17:54.12
Hnuh! 0:17:54.120:17:55.36
  - Argh!
- Ingrid!
0:17:55.360:17:57.36
Ingrid! 0:17:57.360:17:58.88
SHE CHOKES AND COUGHS 0:18:00.160:18:02.96
I AM a monster. 0:18:02.960:18:04.08
You must never let me play this again. 0:18:10.720:18:12.84
Hey, boy. 0:18:49.040:18:50.28
Hey, boy. How's it going? 0:18:50.280:18:52.76
Not so good, actually. 0:18:52.760:18:54.16
I sort of told Araminta 0:18:54.160:18:55.68
she could scrub in on my triple bypass surgery. 0:18:55.680:18:58.24
Oh, I thought Georgiana was scrubbing in 0:18:58.240:19:00.08
on your triple bypass surgery? 0:19:00.080:19:01.56
Yah, no, she was. 0:19:01.560:19:04.04
Doctor? 0:19:04.040:19:05.20
I thought I'd find you two in here. 0:19:09.840:19:11.76
Josephina. 0:19:11.760:19:12.88
Hey, hon. 0:19:12.880:19:14.00
Harry, can I have a word? 0:19:20.640:19:22.64
Yah, no, of course. 0:19:22.640:19:23.76
I just think you should know that Georgiana's, like, really upset 0:19:28.800:19:31.96
that you've asked Araminta to scrub in on your triple bypass surgery. 0:19:31.960:19:35.40
Josephina, can I have a word, please? 0:19:39.200:19:42.56
Araminta. 0:19:42.560:19:43.80
Yah, no, of course. 0:19:43.800:19:45.36
I, er... 0:19:49.600:19:51.64
I just think that you shouldn't go around meddling 0:19:51.640:19:54.68
in people's triple bypass surgeries when it's none of your business. 0:19:54.680:19:58.76
Well, isn't this cosy? 0:20:06.720:20:08.92
- ALL:
  - Georgiana.
0:20:08.920:20:10.04
Looks like you got what you wanted, Harry. 0:20:14.600:20:17.52
I hope you and Araminta are really happy doing triple bypass 0:20:17.520:20:20.12
surgeries together. 0:20:20.120:20:21.36
Doctor! 0:20:22.640:20:23.88
I never want to speak to you again. 0:20:30.000:20:31.92
MACHINE BLEEPS RAPIDLY 0:20:31.920:20:35.40
I'll go. 0:20:35.400:20:36.60
Georgiana, wait! 0:20:37.800:20:38.96
Josephina, wait! 0:20:40.480:20:42.16
Hey, Roman, wait for me, boy! 0:20:44.120:20:46.52
Wait... What about our triple bypass surgery? 0:20:46.520:20:50.52
Hey, babe. 0:20:51.800:20:53.08
Oh, my God. Adrian, is that you? 0:21:02.080:21:04.80
I almost didn't recognise you there for a minute. 0:21:06.520:21:09.08
It's me, Sarah. 0:21:09.080:21:11.80
From that night in the pub, remember? 0:21:11.800:21:13.68
You're not stalking me, are you? Only joking. 0:21:13.680:21:17.44
No, seriously, it's good to see you again, actually. God, what was it? 0:21:17.440:21:21.24
Six months ago? I don't know - something like that, anyway. 0:21:21.240:21:24.92
Yeah, no, my office is just round the corner so, er... 0:21:24.920:21:28.60
Did I tell you I'm a lawyer? I can't remember. Probably did. 0:21:28.600:21:31.52
Yeah, and it's quite a big firm, actually, 0:21:31.520:21:33.96
so, er, got a really good reputation, so I'm just going to stick with it 0:21:33.960:21:36.96
for now and then weigh up my options in a couple of years. 0:21:36.960:21:39.92
See how I feel. Now I'm waffling. Oh, no - it's official. 0:21:39.920:21:42.84
Yeah, no, cos didn't you come back to mine or something? 0:21:42.840:21:47.56
I can't really remember, it was that long ago. 0:21:47.560:21:49.80
Well, six months ago, so not THAT long ago. 0:21:49.800:21:51.88
God, that was a big night. Total mayhem. 0:21:51.880:21:54.76
And then you sort of stayed at mine for, like, the whole weekend. 0:21:54.760:21:57.56
And didn't we watch... Didn't we watch Born Free together, or something? 0:21:57.560:22:00.80
A bit random. I probably cried, did I? 0:22:00.800:22:02.80
And then - what was it - you left, and then never called me again, 0:22:02.800:22:06.08
even though you said you would. Blah-blah-blah. 0:22:06.080:22:09.24
Not that it matters, cos it was a one-night stand, so... 0:22:09.240:22:11.60
Well, two night-stand, actually. Yeah, no, it's a shame 0:22:11.600:22:14.08
you didn't let me know where I stood, though, cos I've sort of been 0:22:14.080:22:16.88
in limbo for half a year, wondering whether or not to pursue other men, 0:22:16.880:22:19.84
because I thought you and me had a connection. 0:22:19.840:22:21.88
Anyway, listen, I'm going to be late for work so, er... 0:22:23.400:22:27.40
I guess I'll see you around, sailor. 0:22:27.400:22:30.20
I meant soldier, not sailor, 0:22:38.200:22:39.72
cos you're not a sailor so that doesn't make sense. 0:22:39.720:22:42.40
Anyway, take care of yourself. 0:22:42.400:22:45.88
VOICES TALKING OVER EACH OTHER 0:22:52.640:22:56.08
Ma'am, we've got Agent Green on the line. She's made it into the mainframe but she needs some help. 0:22:56.080:23:00.32
Right. Put her on speaker. Agent Green? 0:23:00.320:23:03.04
'Chief, chief - we have a code red. 0:23:03.040:23:05.56
'I've managed to infiltrate section four, 0:23:05.560:23:07.76
'but they've rigged the place with a complex explosive. 0:23:07.760:23:10.24
'We've got 73 seconds until this place blows. How do I disarm the bomb?' 0:23:10.240:23:13.52
Right, keep calm, Agent Green. Get me some visuals. 0:23:13.520:23:15.76
Everyone else, I need silence. 0:23:15.760:23:17.20
There's a damn good operative there we need bringing back alive. OK... 0:23:17.200:23:20.88
Elegant, very elegant. 0:23:20.880:23:23.16
Agent Green, I want you to do exactly as I tell you - 0:23:23.160:23:25.28
that way we'll bring you back with all your bits intact. 0:23:25.280:23:27.72
- I'm all ears, ma'am.
  - Good.
0:23:27.720:23:29.32
Now, remove the casing, slide your left hand down the right-hand side. 0:23:29.320:23:33.40
OK, good. 0:23:33.400:23:34.96
No, don't touch the electricals - it's a very delicate mechanism. 0:23:34.960:23:37.76
- Done, ma'am!
  - Good.
0:23:37.760:23:38.80
Now, I want you to quickly move the... The... You know, the thingy. 0:23:38.800:23:44.24
- The fuse?
  - No, God, don't touch that.
0:23:44.240:23:46.32
- The chemical capsule?
  - No, it's, um, it's greeny-blue...
0:23:46.320:23:49.00
- There's nothing green here, ma'am.
  - Gosh. Um... OK. What's it called?
0:23:49.000:23:53.20
Um... Um. Oh, I know - it rhymes with, um, with what's-his-face. 0:23:53.200:23:57.00
  - What's-his-face?
- You know. The one from that film, um...
0:23:57.000:23:59.60
I think Daryl Hannah strangles him with her thighs, or something. 0:23:59.600:24:02.48
- She's either a mermaid...
  - Oh, Splash?
- ..or a robot?
  - Blade Runner?
- Yes!
0:24:02.480:24:06.44
- Yes.
  - Harrison Ford? It rhymes with Harrison Ford?
- No, wait, what?
0:24:06.440:24:09.72
- I'm going to need to push you for an answer, ma'am - we've got 50 seconds!
  - Is he the sexy one in Jurassic Park?
0:24:09.720:24:14.32
  - Oh, Sam Neill?
- 40 seconds! I'm going to make a guess, ma'am!
  - Oh, no,
0:24:14.320:24:17.88
don't - you'll detonate it. It's got either a Y in it, or a G. 0:24:17.880:24:20.80
I tell you what - I'll Google it. Load up the old Nokia. 0:24:20.800:24:24.48
  - Ma'am, it'll blow the place to pieces.
- Gosh, that is so like me.
0:24:24.480:24:27.24
Tip of my tongue. 0:24:27.240:24:28.56
If you don't give me this word in the next six seconds... 0:24:28.560:24:31.40
- Pretty Woman! He was in Pretty Woman!
  - Richard Gere!
- Yes!
0:24:31.400:24:35.00
Thank you. Right, the rear rotor arm, that's it - the rear rotor arm! 0:24:35.000:24:38.08
Slide it back under the optical cross-connect switch 0:24:38.080:24:40.44
and disconnect the red wire from the detonator. 0:24:40.440:24:43.00
Weapon neutralised, ma'am! 0:24:43.000:24:44.88
Good work, Agent Green. Didn't doubt you for a second. 0:24:44.880:24:48.60
Now get yourself out of there. I don't want another one of my agents 0:24:48.600:24:51.52
turned into a terrorist windsock. 0:24:51.520:24:53.08
Understood, ma'am! 0:24:53.080:24:54.24
I just need the code for the door! 0:24:55.840:24:57.68
BEEPING Ma'am? 0:24:57.680:25:00.24
BEEPING CONTINUES 0:25:00.240:25:02.60
I want to say Celine Dion... 0:25:02.600:25:04.68
SAMBA MUSIC 0:25:05.640:25:08.68
MUSIC STOPS 0:25:12.360:25:13.40
DIFFERENT SAMBA MUSIC IN DISTANCE 0:25:13.400:25:16.48
ORIGINAL MUSIC STARTS 0:25:16.480:25:19.88
MUSIC STOPS 0:25:23.960:25:25.24
OTHER MUSIC INTENSIFIES 0:25:25.240:25:27.92
ORIGINAL MUSIC STARTS 0:25:27.920:25:30.76
MUSIC STOPS 0:25:34.120:25:35.16
OTHER MUSIC PLAYS 0:25:35.160:25:36.20
ORIGINAL MUSIC STARTS 0:25:36.200:25:38.92
OTHER MUSIC PLAYS 0:25:38.920:25:41.56
BOTH MELODIES PLAY OVER EACH OTHER 0:25:41.560:25:45.04
MUSIC STOPS 0:25:47.200:25:49.88
BOTH MELODIES PLAY OVER EACH OTHER 0:25:52.480:25:56.28
Thank you for coming so quickly(!) 0:26:26.120:26:27.76
I don't know what's wrong. It just sort of... 0:26:27.760:26:30.96
Oh, great(!) Just my luck. 0:26:30.960:26:34.64
Are you OK? You're not hurt or anything? 0:26:34.640:26:36.64
Just thought I'd get a priority service, what with being a woman, on my own. 0:26:36.640:26:39.80
Well, we're here within 30 minutes as promised, so... 0:26:39.800:26:42.16
I thought at least they'd send a...man. 0:26:42.160:26:43.88
Never mind. PC gone mad. 0:26:43.880:26:47.12
  - Let's take a look at the engine, shall we?
- Finally - thank you(!)
0:26:47.120:26:50.48
I don't mean to be rude - we're not here to chat about chocolate and shoes. 0:26:50.480:26:54.52
OK, Looks like you've got air trapped in the coolant lines. 0:26:54.520:26:57.36
The whole system's overheated. 0:26:57.360:26:58.92
Oh, right. I'll call my husband. He'll give us a second opinion. 0:26:58.920:27:01.64
Well, the car's done about 70,000 miles, so that's spot-on for a blown head gasket. 0:27:01.640:27:05.28
Darling? Yes, the breakdown man's here, only, well - you talk to HER. 0:27:05.280:27:10.28
Tell him what you think's wrong - he'll be able to help. 0:27:10.280:27:12.84
OK... 0:27:13.800:27:14.84
Hello? 0:27:14.840:27:16.32
Right, yeah, I see. OK, thank you, bye. 0:27:16.320:27:21.04
What did he say? 0:27:21.040:27:22.60
He said he's a primary school teacher and doesn't know 0:27:22.600:27:24.96
a thing about cars, so you should just leave it to the experts. 0:27:24.960:27:27.64
So when are they getting here? 0:27:27.640:27:30.36
OK, I'm just going to, er, call the tow truck, 0:27:30.360:27:33.36
get you off to a garage. 0:27:33.360:27:35.52
Calling for backup - at last. 0:27:35.520:27:37.76
Hello. Yeah, I need a tow truck. 0:27:37.760:27:39.88
Honestly. 0:27:41.960:27:43.20
Oh, no?! 0:27:45.080:27:47.52
Right... 0:27:47.520:27:48.92
Let's get it on the truck. 0:27:51.080:27:52.52
This is... This is ridiculous! 0:27:52.520:27:53.96
You can't possibly... You're a...woman! 0:27:53.960:27:56.56
I'm going to flag down some proper help. 0:27:57.520:28:00.60
Mind the road! 0:28:00.600:28:01.64
Can I get some proper hel... 0:28:01.640:28:03.24
TYRES SCREECH 0:28:03.240:28:05.72
God? 0:28:11.440:28:12.52
Welcome. 0:28:13.480:28:15.00
Oh, you've got to be kidding me?! 0:28:15.000:28:18.32
Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd 0:28:45.400:28:48.44